MIDDLE DIGITS

Driving a bus

will earn you

more than your

fair share

of middle digits

Its unavoidable.  When you drive something around that is eight-feet wide and forty-feet long, amongst vehicles half that size, you are going to incur responses, many of the them, unfavorable.

Your intentions may be innocent, but the perception of others may prove otherwise.  You do have a job to do, which means, pulling in and out of traffic on a continual basis, with a schedule to keep (theoretically), and a specific route to drive.  Some things are unavoidable.

In addition to those dynamics, you may have a bus that might not run properly, or even worse, break down in traffic--not a pretty sight.

One minor incident during the summer earned me one of the most classic middle digits I have yet to receive.  It was shortly after sunset on a warm evening, where traffic had subsided, and the pace was rather relaxed.  I was following behind an early-model Mercedes whose driver had his left arm dangling relaxed out the open window towards the ground.  I could not figure out why the street seemed so dark, and I could barely see anything clearly but the taillights of his car.  I decided to switch on my brights to see if that would improve my visibility, which it did.  It also set into motion the Mercedes’ drivers left arm, which slowly rose to a vertical position, and, at the last moment, sprouted a definitive middle digit in my direction.  It then slowly reversed all the aforementioned movements, to resume its original position.

The whole choreography was so classic, it deserved a YouTube moment, but, since this was not possible, I awarded it with a hearty laugh, and a return to my low-beams.

It was only after returning to the yard, that I discovered that one of my low-beam lights had burned out, thus creating the ‘dark’ street conditions that had precipitated my high-beams.

I wouldn’t have traded that middle-digit-moment for two properly-working headlights anyway.

POGO STICKS

One never knows

what will compose

the catalyst for

a connection

While leaving the beach and climbing onto the boardwalk, I came across a woman on an adult-sized tricycle, adorned with both front and rear baskets.  Protruding prominently out of the large rear basket were not one, but two, high-tech adult pogo sticks.  Not being able to pass up the bait, I took a bite.

As it turns out, the cross-pollination of talents and passions have engendered a new generation of jumping-enthusiasts, as aerospace engineers have added, once again, to the incredible array of exercising options that never seem to end.  Jan, our jumper, went on to inform me of various models available, depending on your performance goals, which of course, has spawned competitive events--what a surprise.

She added that the variety of their use has spread to such diverse venues as motocross, where, when a rider is forced into a pit stop situation, they will immediately pick up a pogo stick and start jumping, because the movement accurately replicates the same muscle-groups used during the race, and keeps them warmed up until they can jump back on the bike.

It turns out Jan is an avid runner, surfer, musician, on top of being a resident Psychology professor at Southwestern Community College.  Our conversation transitioned from pogo sticks, to the Paralympics, to a wide variety areas within psychology, including, research and development, and shows and documentaries highlighting variations on the theme.  We gobbled up a quick half-hour in what seemed like five minutes.

Life will always present you with segwaying opportunities for connections, no matter who engineered them and for what reason.

PIZZA DELIVERY

I could weigh

more than I do

had I taken up

all the offers of pizza

that have come my way

One of the funnest ways to connect with people in the moment is to identify with ‘their’ moment, whatever it happens to be.  With passengers boarding the bus, you literally have seconds to connect with them, be it about their hat, hairstyle, dress, shirt-saying, shoes, and, the most obvious, something they are carrying.  Nothing stands out more than the ubiquitous pizza box.

For all the pizza boxes coming my way, my standard approach is thus;  if one box, “You brought me PIZZA!”; for multiple boxes, “You brought the whole BUS pizza!”  It gets them every time.

Out of all those encounters, I am offered a piece at least 50% of the time.  Unfortunately, eating pizza and driving a bus are mutually exclusive, so I always respectfully decline with a “Thanks--I was just kidding!”

It’s a good thing though; I have to watch my waistline so I can leave room for ice cream.

LEFTOVER BUSINESS

Sometimes

its even possible

to participate

in another person’s

magical moment

as a third-party observer

Not long ago, I was stopped at a busy intersection in Mission Hills.  Out from behind a building, and waiting to cross the street in front of me, appeared a couple around thirty.  Being lunch-hour, the box that the woman was holding I took to be leftovers.  As they stopped at the corner, the woman kept glancing back over her shoulder, and would then say something to her hubby, who was, at the time, completely consumed by his phone.

The woman then abruptly disappeared around the corner and out of my view, only to reappear moments later, this time without her leftover container.  She excitedly said something to her man, who afforded her not even a turn of his head.  She glanced again back up the street, looked at him, back up the street, all the while quite excited about the whole affair.  My guess was she had offered her leftovers to someone out of my sight that needed them more than her.

What was most precious was the look of excited expectation on the face of the woman.  She had the countenance of a five-year-old that had personally made a gift for her mom on her birthday, and could barely wait for mom to open it in her presence.

Even though the woman was not directly responsible for what was inside the box, she was responsible for dispensing the gift, and the gift of JOY was all her’s.

MERMAIDS

The mermaids of legend

are not

what we are talking about

but mermaids of

another kind

Kiley, Dawn and Tori were the local mermaids who tended bar at the now-closed Kadan in Normal Heights.  They neither plied the local waters, nor sported aquatic appendages, but dealt with liquid nonetheless.

All three were/are beloved by the patrons of Kadan, who multi-tasked as servers, friends, therapists, and confidants.

Both Kiley and Dawn, who adorn themselves with dogs, also sport displays of tats and piercings, smoke, drink, party hard, and are as sweet as pie.  Tori, originally from the East Coast, headed West to pursue her musical dream, is tall, beautiful, simple and understated, and looks naked without her Fedora.

All three are the faces that welcome weary travelers and lonely sojourners.

Unlike the mermaids of legend, their intent is never to cause shipwreck, but to always to pick up survivors.

SKATER BOYZ

Its truly amazing

how much fun

one can have

in just a few minutes

While stopped at a railroad crossing, two boys carrying skateboards, ran up to the door of the bus.  I opened the doors and asked, “What’s up?”

They both jumped on board, and thanked me for letting them in.  Each had a number pinned to their right sleeves.

“So, what’s up with the numbers?” I asked.

“We just came from a skateboard competition in Carmel Valley,” they responded.

“Wow.  Did you guys take the train up there?”

“No.  Our sponsor drove us up.”

One of them immediately volunteered, “We did really good too.  I got 14th out of 40 in my age division.”

“Was the competition held in a skate park?” I inquired.

Both confirmed that it was, and we were off and running.

In the next few minutes, I would lob skateboard-related questions, and they would volley with skateboard-related answers.  Some of the most important were:

“Have you guys seen the movie and documentary, ‘DOGTOWN & Z-BOYS’?”

Of course they had.

“Have you heard of Bob Burnquist?” (a North-county skateboard champ).

Of course they had.

They asked me, “Do YOU skateboard?”

Of course I don’t.

They asked to be let off at the local Baskin & Robbins in order to celebrate.

"Was there a stop nearby?” they inquired.

Of course there was.

I dropped them off at the B&R with smiles and congrats.  As I pulled away and tooted the horn, they responded with waves, and all was right with the world.

It’s amazing how much fun one can have in just a few minutes.

PRINCESS LEAH

It is rare
that I am upstaged by someone
more forward than myself
but it does happen
  


One such example would be Princess Leah.  She’s not an official ‘princess’ of course, but to me she is.

Our first encounter was at the beginning of summer, where Leah works as a hostess at a busy downtown restaurant.  Because my entire morning diet consists of liquids of some sort (coffee, water, smoothie), it is imperative that I hit up all available restroom opportunities at the beginning of my shift.  This particular bathroom break is required only once; all others are conducted at the other end of the route.

Being the good hostess that she is, Leah is very proactive in welcoming patrons to the restaurant, even bus drivers needing to use the facilities.  My pit stop there, once a week, occurs during the busy lunch-hour, when the place is a beehive of activity, with servers rushing in all directions delivering food.

In our first encounter, Leah greeted me with a big smile, and a hearty “Hello!”  Somewhat surprised by just how hearty that “Hello" was, I returned it with the same, and proceeded to carefully wind my way through the bustle towards the bathrooms, hoping to avoid causing any accidents amidst all the activity.  My exit from the bathroom and restaurant was greeted with the same heartiness in a “See ya!”

Our second encounter a week later was a carbon-copy of the first, but, it was our third encounter that ramped the relationship up a notch.  As I exited the bathroom and wound my way through the crowd, heading for the door, Leah spotted me half-way down the bar, and slowly began to lift her right arm high into the air as I approached.  A bit surprised at first, I realized she was going to send me off with a ‘high-five’.  (Holy crap--all this, the result of three quick encounters over a three-week period.)  Not one to ever pass up such an offer, I obliged her with ‘five’ as I passed and was honored to be accorded such a distinction in her eyes.

Each Monday throughout the summer, we would repeat some version of this scenario, until mid-July, when she raised the stakes again.  As I was entering the restaurant that day, she got the jump on me with the loud greeting, “Hey Gorgeous!”  Taken aback once again, I responded with “Hey Darling!”.  It was with that encounter that she became “Princess Leah”.

A few weeks passed when she was either not working, or was busy helping to deliver food.  Then, one day, not spotting her at all, I noticed as I was about to exit the door after conducting business, that one of the waiters was standing out on the sidewalk, either looking to hail a cab for someone, or pointing out an open parking spot to a waiting car.  As I approached him on the curb, just before crossing the street to return to my bus, a black car, double-parked across the street, slowly rolled down its window.  Out the open window came an arm, and with it, the loud greeting, “Hey Gorgeous!”

The last time we crossed paths, she informed me she graduated to server.  It couldn't have happened to a sweeter princess.

We have since upgraded our high-five status to a hug.

A CARICATURE OF HIMSELF

San Diego
which sports
some of the best
year-around weather
in the lower-48
is a major drawing card
for the homeless



One of the more significantly noticeable characters around town is a fellow named Vince.

Vince is, indeed, a caricature of himself; something out of a “Lord of the Rings” movie.  Short, stooped over, long straggly hair, more than a bit unkempt and often mumbling to himself, he moves forward at a snail’s-pace, and at times has been seen using a walker, which he mostly eschews in favor of his snail’s-pace.

He once moved so slowly across a large intersection in Old Town that the left-hand turn lane I was in could not proceed on our green light, and thus totally screwed up the light-cycle for ten minutes.  The lane registered no new traffic into it, so it would not give us another green.  It was only after I jumped out of my bus and ran forward to inform the driver in front that he would have to go when safe against the light or we would all be there all day.

I learned Vince’s name early on, always welcome him onto the bus, and we usually exchange pleasantries.  He returns to ‘normal’ in our short exchanges, but we never delve into anything of depth.  Treating Vince cordially is not always transferable in his mind.  Saying goodbye upon departure one time, he immediately got into a verbal argument with someone at the bus stop over something completely insignificant.

Vince then resumed his normal mumbling and proceeded to speed off at a snail’s-pace.

BEST-DRESSED MAN

From the moment
he stepped onto the bus
I knew Darryl
was someone special



He was a distinguished-looking black man in his mid-50’s, sporting a great smile, which was only outdone by his strikingly-white tuxedo.

“WOW!”, I said.  “I hope you have someplace important to go.”

“Hey, it’s my birthday!”, he responded.

“It looks like you’re planning on having a great one.” I replied.

Darryl is amongst a town full of struggling musicians just trying to catch a break.  A jazz trumpeter all his life, Darryl is always dressed for the occasion.  I have never seen him walking the streets or catching a bus ‘out of style’.

Darryl has played with some of the best that come to town, performed at the most prestigious venues, but is always left scratching out an existence that is not born on his demeanor.  He is always cheerful, considerate, polite, and upbeat, but you can sense the struggle underneath the surface.  I have felt honored to be able to help him out through a couple of rough patches.

Our moments together are always precious; two brothers just catching up as quickly as we can in the seconds allowed between driver and passenger.  We have strung together a wonderful collection of moments over the past three years that rate amongst the best.

No matter what circumstance Darryl may find himself in, he will always be the best-dressed man around town.

SWEET TREAT TRIFECTA

My weekly pilgrimage
to Trader Joes
involves the restocking
of my all-important
kettle-corn reserves



The store I frequent is the smallest and busiest in all of San Diego, so, I usually position my cart in about two or three different locations and just run up and down the aisles grabbing what I need and dropping them off as I proceed to the next item.

As I approached the location where the kettle-corn was stocked, there was a young mother with her 4 year old daughter, who happened to be singing some little song about ‘sweet treats’.  As I reached both hands forward to grab my 5 to 6 bags of corn, I looked towards the girl with a big smile and said, “No matter what you do, do not buy any of this kettle-corn, for it is indeed a ‘sweet treat’”.  Initially embarrassed that I even noticed her singing, she replied, “You’re funny!”

We just happened to cross paths again in the frozen-food section, where I dutifully reminded the young girl, “Make sure you don’t buy any of this kettle-corn”, to which she giggled her reply with, “You’re silly.”

And, last, but not least, we could not avoid meeting in the produce section, where, of course, I admonished her one last time, and was met with only an embarrassed giggle.  My guess is she took me up on my advice and left Trader Joes without any kettle-corn.

NATURE CHANGE

 I had a guy
get on the bus
and immediately ask
“When do we leave?"



 I answered him, “In five minutes”.  He immediately ‘sized me up’, commenting by my haircut that I must be ex-military or law enforcement, a staunch conservative Republican, and probably an insufferable Christian--all of which I am NONE.   All this was derived from my appearance alone in the first minute.

A lady boarded shortly afterwards and sat directly across from him.  They immediately launched into a very loud ‘discussion’ about everything wrong with the world, talking uninterruptedly over the top of each other (neither chose to listen to the other), and dominated the entire atmosphere on the bus.  The guy pointed out that the issues he was dealing with were all the relationships gone wrong, stupid government agencies, AND, bus drivers like THAT guy (me).

I just ignored (as best I could) the conversation, and continued to greet new passengers coming on board like I always do--LOVING EVERYBODY & having fun.  There were occasional pauses in the aforementioned ‘discussion’ where I would catch the guy watching me relate to other passengers, including a few who I had already built fun relationships with.  By the time the guy finally exited the bus, his demeanor had completely changed, and he thanked me for the ride.

SKATER GIRL

 I had a young
twenty-something girl
ride my beach route
once a week throughout the spring



Our first encounter dealt with her riding her skateboard across a very busy and dangerous street trying to catch my bus.  As I watched her risk her life and roll up quickly to the front door of the bus, I exclaimed, “Crazy hair, girlfriend!”  (She happened to have numerous tats, piercings, and a very cute haircut to go with her fluorescent orange hair color.)  She was extremely outgoing, loved that I noticed her hair, and we quickly hit it off.  (I didn’t even bother to mention her daredevil skateboard riding.)

Chrissy (our skater-girl), and I, would cross paths just once a week for three months.  Our encounters lasted less than 5 seconds each, and were always punctuated in the end by her yelling out “Thanks!” as she would depart out the rear door and tear off on her skateboard.  The substance of our connection transcended time spent, age, race, gender, wardrobe, hairstyle, or any other version of separation one can come up with.  The connection was nothing but fun for the both of us.  She was just a ball of fun being herself and enjoyed the fact that some else happened to enjoy it with her.

UP THE CREEK

One will see
people at bus stops
accompanied by
a wide variety
of accessories



I rolled up to a busy downtown stop, serviced by multiple routes, with a man sitting on the bench with a weatherbeaten canoe paddle resting next to him.  He waved me off as I approached, meaning he was waiting for a different bus, but I proceeded to stop anyway, opened the door, and could not resist the temptation to exclaim, “If you find yourself up the creek, you at least have a paddle.”  With a laugh, he waved me on.

DIVINE ECHOS

I boarded a family
on the bus
who seemed to be returning
from a trip



The family included a set of 4 year old twin girls, with beautiful strawberry-blond curly hair, and dressed in matching outfits.  After commenting to them that they must have shopped at the same place, they cheerfully took their seats with their parents.

Driving a bus requires calling out stops at important intersections.  The girls quickly caught on and began to echo my street call-outs, followed by giggles.  Nothing is more special than the innocent delight of small children having fun.  I started calling out streets that were not even required just to elicit their responses.  The whole bus was soon enjoying the spectacle.

The dad, whole initially was a bit embarrassed, soon realized I was ‘game’ for the fun, and reminded the girls which street they would be getting off the bus.  When we reached their street, instead of calling out the stop, I announced to the girls, “And the next stop is  . . . “, to which they responded in unison, “30th & Upas!”  Everyone had a good laugh upon departure, and thus ended a perfect vacation trip for the girls.

PROVOCATIVE ADVERTISING

Standing at a bus stop
on a very warm afternoon
was a scantily-clad teenager



She wore a sleeveless top with the inscription, “SUCK ME--F*CK ME”.  After I regained my composure, I jokingly asked her, “Do you get many offers from your shirt?”.

Her only reply was a wry smile.

GETTING CRABBY

 A couple of weeks ago
while hiking my ‘private’ beach
I came across a rock crab
cruising up the wet sand
heading for the dunes



This is an area far from their normal habitat, and also an area where somebody like that will quickly become seagull brunch.  I slowly stepped in front of his path, crouched down and informed him that this was not a good idea.  He proceeded to continue his journey unabated and walked right under me, stopping in the shade I was creating.  I informed him that this was not going to work, because I would soon be heading up the beach, and he should really consider a u-turn and head back into the surf.  

He then proceeded to walk up to my right foot, climb up onto my shoe, and come to a rest.  As surprised as I was by this development, I was forced to let him know that this was not going to work either.
I then slowly started to bring both hands into a position in order to remove him from my shoe.  
 As he noticed what was about to happen, he simply crawled right up onto one of my hands.  I brought him up to my face, and reminded him what I thought was best.  I proceeded to walk down to the surf line, lowered my hand to the water, but he refused to leave.  I actually had to push his little butt off with my other hand so I could proceed on my way.

All are very fun examples of the ‘connectedness’ of life, regardless of form, which recognizes the LOVE which resides in all form.  The only limitations on our experience of life are the ones we place on it.

RADIANT SMILE

While having coffee
with my best friend
I was introduced
to the newest waitress
at our favorite watering hole



We both exclaimed what a radiant smile she had.  Ellie immediately transitioned into a ‘confession’ about having just broken off a six-year relationship (she is now 27) and was just beginning to ‘find herself’ again.

What transpired over the next five minutes was an amazing time of both Russell and I just ‘loving her up’, helping her to realize that ‘special’ relationships done wrong tend to limit our experience and expression, and encouraging her that the best time now lies ahead.   We bottom-lined our contributions to just ‘follow your JOY’ wherever it leads you.

The connection was way better than the coffee.